Monday, March 21, 2005

And to add to the cluster fuck that was last week

Probably the earliest hint that the week was going to be tough was being in Bozeman for the first time since our move. It was really hard. I was a little bitter about the whole thing. Even though the move was our choice, I felt that it was a bit much to move all the way out here after having to sell our home and then have spouse's employers decide not to follow us out here (despite the original plans to that effect). It had a definate bait and switch vibe for me. And since I am still looking for work, life out here feels a little unsettled. I found out that I didn't get the job that I wanted (but it's ok- there were some mitigating factors that made it better this way), and I didn't get the chance to see many of my friends. I am hoping that I can turn it around pretty quickly- get a job (I DO have a plan), and we can move closer to Spouse's work. But it was kind of jarring to go back. And I didn't have the heart to go to visit my old house. Too much...

And insult to injury- the greenhouse that I tried to purchase 2 years ago is on the market. My friend (who was going to run it on his own) has decided that it is too much for him. This makes me sad for him- but I also feel pretty crappy that I don't have the chance to buy it now. Irony of ironies...

I think I will get away from the computer and the self-pity party that I'm having and go to the library. It feels better to get it all out, and I think that it'll all be fine in the end- but it feels a tad insurmountable right about now.

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