I have to unexpectedly fly to MT on Friday. I had very different plans for the weekend, but things changed.
My grandmother collapsed. She has been dotty as hell in the last few years. Seems that it wasn't a stroke. It wasn't a broken bone. It was an infection. And because she has some form of dementia, it threw her into someplace else. We don't exist there. She is in the hospital, but is convinced that she's on a boat, and my uncle K. is down the hall waiting for her. They have her in restraints because she is overly agitated, and they don't trust her balance.
I am going home to help my mother pack. Grandma is moving from her apartment in the nice assisted care facility into a full-on 24 hour care facility. It's just one step further along this particular path. Not like it's a huge surprise, or anything. But it just is so fucking difficult to watch someone disappear before my eyes- while leaving behind a shell. I can't really imagine how hard it is on my mom. That's why I am going.
Good news- she is a wonderful cook, and mixes a stiff drink. (she has some hard liquor hooch produced by the Hutterites that is ...well...something from another world- rhubarb and rasin, believe it or not. Sounds scary- but is probably the best thing I've ever ingested.)
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4 comments:
Oh NO!!!
So sorry to hear. Is K going with you?
Good luck, my dear!
I have a similar situation waiting to happen. Not looking forward to it. Two years ago, no one in my family but me would have considered using the word 'dimentia' to describe my grandmother's occasional problems. My mom just used it to describe her that way when she came to visit.
Change is good most of the time, but not when it comes to watching people you love disintegrate.
luck to you.
Thanks all-
It's a solo show. K. gets to stay behind and hang with the cats and his new motorcycle (but he offered, and meant it too). Since I'm flying, it's not such a big deal. It's the 11 hour car drive that would suck alone.
And yes Sean, it is impossible to describe how hard it is to watch. And my mom was the lone voice in the wilderness for a long time. Now her siblings (who all live on average 12 hours away) are admitting that she was right. Small fucking consolation there.
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