Since not too much is going on in my life, I'll plunder my friends' lives for stories that amuse me.
Our friend Dave was biking to his job in Phoenix from Tempe every day (about 10 miles) during one summer. He was working at an archetecture firm in a large building downtown. Sadly, the homeless from stink park had access to the bathroom in the building...more on that later.
The morning in question, Dave was running late. He grabs a frappucino from the fridge, downs it and gets on his bike. By the time he gets downtown, he has the ominous rumblings in his lower intestine that signal serious trouble coming down the pipes.
He runs into the bathroom (click, click, click- he was wearing his riding shoes). Since the homeless have made the bathroom messy, he hovers rather than sits. And lets go. Ahhhhhh.....
Then he gets ready to leave and notices that to his horror, he missed the bowl of the toilet and coated the rear wall of the stall with frappucino, etc. He goes to the sink to wash up, and slink off to the office...
Then a guy in a suit from one of the offices comes into the bathroom. He sees the stall, and says, "Goddamned homeless!" Dave agrees, nods and leaves....
So that kids is a parable about not drinking frappucino, getting on a bike and riding 10 miles in the summer in Phoenix where it's wicked hot. Bad things happen. And the homeless get blamed.
And as a sidenote, stink park isn't the official name- I called it that. It is a shantytown of homeless that has a nasty smell in the summer. Due to said homeless. Not a place I go- just drive by on occasion.
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3 comments:
EW.
Yes, definitely a life lesson for all of us. I doubt I will ever have this problem, however, not being disposed toward 1) drinking frappucinos, 2) riding my bike for long distances, or 3) living in wicked hot places. Still, I am sorry for his misfortune. Thank goodness the homless were there to blame, right? See, they DO give back to the community!
I hope you hear soon on your job. Waiting sucks.
nice.
i love such stories. they make me smile.
maybe you should tell the story when Benke and Bri-guy stayed up all night studying for a test by drinking a whole jar of Yuba Instant Coffee.
more mirth.
And I have plenty of bad poop stories. I will make them into a series of sorts. Life lessons, if you will. Basically coffee is your enemy. Or your enema. Whatever.
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