Breaking through and starting up with anything lately is like pushing through the flat part of a drum. Like there's a membrane keeping me from the other side. And it's stretchy and pully. Probably sticky too- because membranes are mostly icky.

Making me very useless around birthing things. Icky.

Making me very useless around leather factories. Icky.

Pretty much have to resign myself to being useless pretty much everywhere in the world but here. And here is debatable.

1 month 13 days. Then the dole. Not like the bananas. More like last year. And the year before. The hours just pile up. Looking like they would be nice from this vantage point. But I already know that it's a trap. And a lie. Because with the dole comes anxiety of a different sort. Maybe not the yellow LED nightmare, but other nightmares willingly fill the void.

Polish the resume. Get out there and meet and greet. Remember to smile. Remember to play the game. Remember to keep positive.