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I found this on a Portugese blog- I'm sure I'm screwing up etiqette here, but can't resist. I think the tiger is being measured for a coat. Or a bedspread.
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"The caretakers of the various cemeteries involved report that no ghosts walk."
€ A man was reported throwing rocks and wood at passing vehicles on East Valley Center Spur Road.
€ Someone upended a portable toilet at a construction site on West Katina Court.
Rocks and wood??? WTF!!!! Is it Cro Magnon recreation day already? I don't have my fur bathrobe ready yet! Damn...
€ There were three horses at large on Cottonwood Road Thursday.
€ Someone stole a dresser in front of a store on Arden Drive Thursday.
(Damned horses! They're stealing chew to fight the worms and a dresser to store it in...always blame the livestock- too much time on their hands...hooves)
€ A woman called police Wednesday and asked for information on how to trap a skunk.
€ A dog "relieved" itself in the Babcock Fields and the owner didn't clean it up, a caller reported Wednesday. The dog's owner said he would clean it up before he left the park.
€ A man told police Wednesday that someone shot him in the eye with a spitball while he was driving on North Willson Avenue.
€ A caller told deputies Wednesday that a dog on Pache Road barks constantly. The owner said the dog only barks when cars are speeding on the road. Nonetheless, the owner was warned that the barking dog was bothering his neighbors.